Echoes in a Hollow Space

3:21 AM on Mon, Jul 17, 2023:

I'm more familiar
with 3 am than 6
but I rose for years at
hellish 6 to join the daily
grind, forced into
unnatural rhythms
but now I'm free
I rise when my eyes open
I sleep when they close
I still have bad nights,
hellish mornings
but at least I'm free
of the clock's tyranny

2:54 AM on Sun, Jul 16, 2023:

shall I write of pain
or of the smoke
drifting through the open
window from the fire pit
across the way choking
like remorse before it fades
or shall I instead write
of the downy soft cat
who wants to cuddle
despite the heat
her purring a balm to all
the pain that aches me?

3:00 AM on Fri, Jul 14, 2023:

no pressure
you did this
to yourself
no one has any
expectations
except you
but that's the thing
isn't it?
we always martyr
ourselves
on our own
expectations

3:07 AM on Wed, Jul 12, 2023:

memories crowding around
like guests uninvited to a party
they have stayed too long
leaning against the walls
wondering if they dare to dance
but I'm too tired to indulge them
wishing but too polite to say
they should just grab a beer
and go home

 

If you want to read all I've done so far (they're not all good), you can go here.

3:16 AM on Wed, Jul 19, 2023:

regrets
they're useless things
aren't they?
they solve nothing
they cleanse nothing
yet they swim often
up from the depths
grinning like Nessie
always glad for the
chance to rattle reality
with another
cryptic sighting

3:09 AM on Tue, Jul 18, 2023:

don't invite fairies inside
make a nice spot in the
garden for their repose
pour a libation of Irish whiskey
and have one for yourself
it will help your nerves if you
offend them somehow and they decide to make mischief
oh, and don't call them fairies
the Good People hate that

3:21 AM on Mon, Jul 17, 2023:

I'm more familiar
with 3 am than 6
but I rose for years at
hellish 6 to join the daily
grind, forced into
unnatural rhythms
but now I'm free
I rise when my eyes open
I sleep when they close
I still have bad nights,
hellish mornings
but at least I'm free
of the clock's tyranny

2:54 AM on Sun, Jul 16, 2023:

shall I write of pain
or of the smoke
drifting through the open
window from the fire pit
across the way choking
like remorse before it fades
or shall I instead write
of the downy soft cat
who wants to cuddle
despite the heat
her purring a balm to all
the pain that aches me?

3:28 AM on Sat, Jul 15, 2023:

The Nightwatch:
the neighbors asleep
no hiss of tires on
the street outside
my windchimes don't sing
in the hot, still night
I'm the only one awake
but sleeplessness
is not that kind
somewhere nearby
someone else will also be
on the nightwatch

3:00 AM on Fri, Jul 14, 2023:

no pressure
you did this
to yourself
no one has any
expectations
except you
but that's the thing
isn't it?
we always martyr
ourselves
on our own
expectations

2:52 AM on Thu, Jul 13, 2023:

how can I sleep when
the humidity closes in
like a sweaty lover
without good boundaries
and no fan is powerful
enough to free me
from that embrace?

3:07 AM on Wed, Jul 12, 2023:

memories crowding around
like guests uninvited to a party
they have stayed too long
leaning against the walls
wondering if they dare to dance
but I'm too tired to indulge them
wishing but too polite to say
they should just grab a beer
and go home

2:30 AM on Tue, Jul 11, 2023:

in the liminal space
at the end of the day
when sleep approaches
like a shy, purring cat
to knead at my
consciousness
turning in circles
looking for a place
to settle

2:11 AM on Mon, Jul 10, 2023:

dark energy, some physicists
say, is the force of
emptiness, a void in the
cosmic web pushing the
matter of the universe
farther and farther
from where it began
and it's everywhere,
between us around us
within us without us
pushing us away
always away
from where we began

3:01 AM on Sun, Jul 09, 2023:

the world is small sometimes
so small and cold and selfish
it can be large though
large and warm and free
if imagination and compassion
can hold it up to the light
hold hands with me
let's give it a try

 
2:58 AM on Sat, Jul 08, 2023:

watching the night away
watching the detectives
oh I used to be so cute
shoot shoot shoot
now I'll sink down
into shoot 'em up dreams
ni-night ni-night

1:57 AM, July 6, 2023:

go to sleep now
you know you are tired
and all this faffing about
does you no good
unspin that brain
unpin your eyes
and let them close now
close now close now

11:45 PM July 6, 2023:

this will all make
better sense
in the morning
that’s what
I tell myself
over and over
but it never does

2:30 a.m., July 5, 2023:

in the early hours
still posing as night
winding and unwinding
waiting for sleep
to find me
and not make me
get out of this chair
to find it

 
2:00 a.m., July 4, 2023:

tuning to the night, owl
listening to the still silence
after the ordinance barrage
in the pre-holiday streets
wondering if the heavens
find our racket too annoying
*
restless, waiting
memory surrounds me
like a fortress
made of glass
*
all this striving
all this longing
peeters out into the cosmos
like cliches turned to dust