Ask me something silly—please?

[pjthompson]

I need more questions for my FAQ for my website, so I'm throwing the floor open to questions here. The sillier the better, my friends. Grotesque, lame, halt, spacey...I am open to everything. Except serious. You can even ask me questions you'd rather ask someone else, since I'm pretty boring. Or one of my characters, if you're familiar with any of my writing.

Ask, ASK, ASK

Thanks.

p.s. I know I've been largely absent lately. Mostly because of busyness, though some of the busyness was monkey business, but that's another story. Regular blogging may return sometime soon.

Here's a touching scene for you from Arizona:

Comments

[paft.livejournal.com]

Can I heat up your Dr. Pepper for you?

[pjthompson]

lol

[pjthompson]

Bubba tried that in the microwave the other night and the durned thing exploded. I guess he should have popped the top first.

[paft.livejournal.com]

Also, see my latest post (X-rated.)

[pjthompson]

The answer is, "Not in that order."

[hominysnark.livejournal.com]

If two trains are traveling on the same track but start on different ends and one train is traveling at 30 mph and the other at 40 mph where will they meet?

[pjthompson]

African or European?

[asakiyume.livejournal.com]

LOL--and laden or unladen :-)

[lizziebelle.livejournal.com]

What... no, that's no good. How many... naw, that's no good either. Oh, here's a good one: which is your favorite Beatle?

[pjthompson]

When I was ten, it was Paul. When I was thirteen, it was George. Now that I'm a grown up lady, it's John John John. Ringo never had a shot, poor boy.

[sartorias.livejournal.com]

Arizsona's gov't needs a good dose of Harpo and brothers.

Questions, let me see: what classical works would go better with zombies? Which with an army of commando old ladies with umbrellas?

If a train leaves a station going fifty mph, and a rocketship leaves an asteroid port at fifty zimblats, what will they be serving in the Tentacle Lounge?

What do you think Horace really meant when he said "O noctes cenaeque deum!"?

[pjthompson]

Arizsona's gov't needs a good dose of Harpo and brothers.

I was going to say they're already acting like the Marx brothers, but yanno, the Marxes are way too intelligent for that.

what classical works would go better with zombies?

I've been longing for a zombie/Middlemarch crossover.

Which with an army of commando old ladies with umbrellas?

Sounds like a scenario straight out of Ryder Haggard to me!

If a train leaves a station going fifty mph, and a rocketship leaves an asteroid port at fifty zimblats, what will they be serving in the Tentacle Lounge?

Champagne and sushi so fresh it was caught next week.

What do you think Horace really meant when he said "O noctes cenaeque deum!"?

You know, I ask myself that every day. What did Horace mean? (Although it usually takes the form of "What the hell does that mean?")

[batagur.livejournal.com]

Here via hominysnark

Does anyone ever expect the Spanish Inquisition?

[pjthompson]

Three, four times max, then after that it's a complete shock.

[geniusofevil.livejournal.com]

Why did President Obama make all the dinosaurs go exctint? He's totally ruining my life!

[pjthompson]

It's socialism, little one. It has powers of evil more powerful than a locomotive.

[darkspires.livejournal.com]

Your are standing at an airport and you have a free ticket to visit seven countries of your choice. This will be for first class seats, limo taxis and five star hotels only because this exercise is meant to be fun and not miserable.

In each of the seven countries you have to pick one activity/place to see/do. List them in order of favorite first.

[pjthompson]

1. Far Rangunar to suck on the honey bats.
2. Deepest Mumblelay to walk in the steps of Holy Chook the Ruffian Barber.
3. Ohangasack, New Jersey for the incredibly delicious deep fried sausage necks.
4. San Francisco to take in some shows.
5. Imperialist Vushka to watch the belly dancing high kickers.
6. Old Mehiquek to climb the Pyramid of Sore Toes.
7. Numisuela to watch the sun going down over the Glorious Golden Cranium at Lands' End.

[hkneale.livejournal.com]

When you die, do you want your mortal remains in orbit around earth, or sent to the moon?

[pjthompson]

Definitely the moon—the green cheese side—so I can spend eternity as fondue.

[asakiyume.livejournal.com]

If you had to [attempt to] throw a ball over a landmark building, what building would you pick?

[pjthompson]

This place:

http://www.guinnessworldrecords.com/records/science_and_technology/buildings/smallest_purpose-built_cinema_in_operation.aspx

[asakiyume.livejournal.com]

What a totally cute movie theater! I want to see something there.

How did you learn about it?

[pjthompson]

I typed "smallest historic building in the world" into Google when you asked the question. I'm a total fraud. :-)

But it is adorable, isn't it?

[asakiyume.livejournal.com]

LOL--I applaud your resourcefulness--and now we both have a new interesting destination.

[pjthompson]

Exactly!

[kmkibble75.livejournal.com]

Who is your favorite Smurf?

[pjthompson]

Papa. Since he's the only one whose name I remember.