Which funky is it?
Mar. 4th, 2009 01:48 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
pjthompsonSo, the funky voice problems continue in the first part of chapter 14 of Angels. I'm wondering now if it's just funky voice or if my problem may also involve a funky frame to hang this part of the plot on? I also suspect there may be at least one superfluous character. (Loreo, for those of you reading along at home.) Mostly he just sits around nodding sagely, listening to people talk, issuing the occasional command. I could probably cut him, but then I'd have to shift the job description of someone else around to fill the void, and...
The problem there is that he'll be much more relevant in books two and three of the trilogy.
Aye me. I'm at that stage of pre-submission suppressed panic and nothing seems right. I can't tell if it's because it really isn't right or because I'm looking for an excuse not to send it out. I'll push on with the rewrite and see how I feel about a restructure when I reach the end. I really like the first eleven chapters, anyway, and the ending kicks butt, if I do say so myself.
It has seemed for some time now that the voice I use in Angels doesn't really feel like my own. In parts it does, but in other places it's like I'm borrowing someone else's voice. I ran this by my friend who I've known since I was twelve, who's read...let's see...most of what I've written. "Rereading Shivery Bones has really pointed out how different the voice is between that, Angels, and Venus," I told her. "I think Bones and Venus are more representative of my true voice."
"And I think," she said, "that Bones is more representative of the voice of a younger you. Venus is more representative of who you are now."
She is brilliant and she is correct. That's the dissonance I'm feeling. Angels is pulling between the old and the new and that works fine in places. Others, not so much. I don't quite know what to do with that since I was hoping to start marketing Angels. I was going to push through and start marketing anyway, and I probably will do that, because I just can't trust my objectivity here, but this dreaded middle makes me wonder.
It also occurred to me that I didn't "dream" that book as much as I did the others—and that kind of creative daydreaming, for me anyway, seems to be intimately connected with voice. The voice is a direct result of being intensely inside the idea for awhile before it starts coming out of me.
On a positive note, I've begun posting things to the Online Writing Workshop again. The first three chapters of Shivery Bones because I've thought of a couple of more places to try that book and I wanted to be sure the new prologue/chapter beginning worked with the rest of the opening. I was so burned out from crits when I gave up posting to OWW (going on two years ago) that I wasn't sure if I'd ever post again. But I've enjoyed being back, doing crits. I might even post the opening to Venus In Transit to see if I can poke myself into finishing up there.
But first, the rest of the Angels rewrite. For better or worse.
A Rain of Angels
The problem there is that he'll be much more relevant in books two and three of the trilogy.
Aye me. I'm at that stage of pre-submission suppressed panic and nothing seems right. I can't tell if it's because it really isn't right or because I'm looking for an excuse not to send it out. I'll push on with the rewrite and see how I feel about a restructure when I reach the end. I really like the first eleven chapters, anyway, and the ending kicks butt, if I do say so myself.
It has seemed for some time now that the voice I use in Angels doesn't really feel like my own. In parts it does, but in other places it's like I'm borrowing someone else's voice. I ran this by my friend who I've known since I was twelve, who's read...let's see...most of what I've written. "Rereading Shivery Bones has really pointed out how different the voice is between that, Angels, and Venus," I told her. "I think Bones and Venus are more representative of my true voice."
"And I think," she said, "that Bones is more representative of the voice of a younger you. Venus is more representative of who you are now."
She is brilliant and she is correct. That's the dissonance I'm feeling. Angels is pulling between the old and the new and that works fine in places. Others, not so much. I don't quite know what to do with that since I was hoping to start marketing Angels. I was going to push through and start marketing anyway, and I probably will do that, because I just can't trust my objectivity here, but this dreaded middle makes me wonder.
It also occurred to me that I didn't "dream" that book as much as I did the others—and that kind of creative daydreaming, for me anyway, seems to be intimately connected with voice. The voice is a direct result of being intensely inside the idea for awhile before it starts coming out of me.
On a positive note, I've begun posting things to the Online Writing Workshop again. The first three chapters of Shivery Bones because I've thought of a couple of more places to try that book and I wanted to be sure the new prologue/chapter beginning worked with the rest of the opening. I was so burned out from crits when I gave up posting to OWW (going on two years ago) that I wasn't sure if I'd ever post again. But I've enjoyed being back, doing crits. I might even post the opening to Venus In Transit to see if I can poke myself into finishing up there.
But first, the rest of the Angels rewrite. For better or worse.
A Rain of Angels
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no subject
Date: 2009-03-05 12:43 am (UTC)I'm looking forward to reading the rest of Bones, too. You *are* going to send it to me, aren't you?
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Date: 2009-03-05 01:24 am (UTC)I could just be having a pre-send-out panic attack, too. :-/
I'm looking forward to reading the rest of Bones, too. You *are* going to send it to me, aren't you?
If you want it, I'll send it. I do put my characters through TONS of hell, though. You sure?
no subject
Date: 2009-03-05 09:21 am (UTC)I know saying "don't worry about it" won't help, so I won't. :)
Please send it. I have a few things to get through first, but I like what I read on the shop. I'd be happy to read the rest if you tell me what kind of comments you want (if you want any).
I need to answer your email, too. It's been staring at me from my inbox.
no subject
Date: 2009-03-05 01:20 am (UTC)Keep your chin up. I think Angels will do fine with being sent out. You'll definitely find problems with it if you stare long enough, so sometimes it's better to just stop looking.
no subject
Date: 2009-03-05 01:26 am (UTC)You know...you're probably right. I've just stared at it too long. I think I'll go with my original plan, finish the polish, and start shopping it. :-)
I've decided to post at least the first chapters of Venus to the shop as an incentive to myself. I'm probably not going to change much, just to let you know. You'll have already read this so no need to put yourself through that again. If I make significant changes, I'll let you know. And maybe someday soon I can actually type The End!
no subject
Date: 2009-03-05 08:04 am (UTC)You know how obsessive I am, so I would keep the book and mull over it and then set it aside and then pull it out and mull and tweak some more and then would set it aside...
Yeah, that's me.
But Kev is right. At some point, we have to stop staring and go with it. So stick you to your plan and send it out. You never know what will happen. :)
no subject
Date: 2009-03-09 12:07 am (UTC)